Raining
by xequth
Summary: As he walks though a garden in a rainstorm, Zuko reflects on how unattainable his first love is. [PostWar, Zutara, Kataang][R&R, please]


**A/N:**A short one-shot inspired by listening to the Cruxshadows cover of 'Here Comes the Rain Again'. If you can track down a recording, listen to it while reading this, it really adds to the mood. It contains one-sided Zutara and implied Kataang. I remain uncertain about how well I characterised Zuko, so any feedback about that would be a big help. Constructive criticism greatly appreciated.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender or anything connected with it.

**_Raining_**

The rain poured down in elegant cascades. Each drop of water held the light for a fragment of a second. In a matter of moments everything was soaked. The gardens of the palace fast became treacherously muddy. Few people were out in the deluge. The Fire Nation was not known for liking rain.

"My lord, it would be advisable to go in."

Barely glancing up at the helmeted guard who had spoken, Zuko said, "I'm fine. You can go if you wish." He trudged onward, as if the rainstorm did not exist.

"But, Fire Lord, we're not supposed to – "

He was cut off by fiery glare. The guard gulped. Even after six years of service, the scarred eye could still stun him into silence. He snapped his heels together in a salute and hurried off for the safety of the barracks.

Zuko's eyes watched him go. He wouldn't tolerate such insolence from a normal soldier, but he had ensured that most of his personal guard was made up of those who had been with him in his years of exile. It was his little bit of sentimentality. The fact that they were more loyal to him than most other troops was secondary. At least, that's what he told himself.

As he walked onward, he lost himself in thoughts. Negotiating a trade agreement with Omashu; bringing the last remnants of the rebelling Fire Nation Army into line; signing the final peace agreement with the Northern Water Tribe; meeting with the ambassadors…

The ambassadors. Without conscious thought Zuko's feet had carried him to below the visitors' wing of the palace. Currently staying here were the Avatar and the two ambassadors to the South Pole. Aang, Sokka and… Katara.

He had told himself a thousand times it was a childish crush. During the time he was chasing the Avatar he had managed to suppress it. After the war it had resurfaced. She was an ambassador, he had to treat her as an equal or risk offending the Water Tribe. That had just made his feelings grow.

She was beautiful now. Her eyes had a certain spark; her hair a certain shine; her mouth a certain curve. Never hesitating to speak out, or insist on something, she had made negotiating rather difficult. Had he lost his self-discipline he may have agreed to every one of the Water Tribes requests. That was how much she affected him.

Her hands were what he admired most: brown, slim and smooth. Totally different from his; his were pale and rough, calloused and scarred. Her hands moved in such intricate, serpentine patterns when she water-bended. No fire-bender could ever make it seem so effortless, so natural.

He had felt the cool touch of her hands only once. After the final battle, all the injured had been gathered in the hall. Being the only healer in the palace, Katara had gone and eased the pain of every wounded soldier, Zuko included. She was like an angel, clothed in blue. Contrasting the red and blood that surrounded her, she brought calm to those seeing though a haze of pain. No matter their allegiance, she had healed them all.

That was why he loved her.

There, he had admitted it, if only to himself. Besides, it didn't matter what he felt. She would never think of him that way for two reasons…

However forgiving she was, Katara had suffered; suffered in a war that he had fought in and supported wholeheartedly. Her mother had been killed; her people decimated. She didn't hold him personally responsible for these things, but they would always be there; barrier between them that neither would attempt to break down. The Avatar had missed those hundred years of war; but Katara had not.

The Avatar… He was the second reason. It was painfully obvious what he felt for the water-bender. Shy smiles in her direction; gifts and surprises… You couldn't ignore the reaction he got either. Her face lit up every time she saw Aang. Whenever they stayed at the palace, they always had little conversations and shared enough nervous glances to make him sick.

He wouldn't dare interfere in their cute little romance. He liked Katara too much and respected Aang's right to find happiness. It was a pity it had to come at such a price; denying him his.

He just wished they would stop dancing around each other like the love-struck teenagers they were and tell each other what they were feeling. If they were finally a couple, then maybe he'd have the motivation to move on; to forget.

As these thoughts had been running through his head, he had come to a halt beside a bench. As he sat down on it he looked up at the sky. Rain. Why did it have to be raining? He would prefer thunder and lightning at least. Then he could amuse himself by redirecting lighting. But just rain… Rain meant water; water meant water-bending; water-bending meant Katara.

And the last thing he wanted to be continually reminded of was his unrequited love. He should move on. It had been years. But he had never been able to her out of his head. He was the Fire Lord; leader of a powerful nation, yet he had his heart set on the only woman he could never have. One touch; one look; one moment was all he wanted and all he would never have.

All he had to do was be strong; see the merits of other women and these feelings would fade over time. He just had to accept that she didn't love him, hell, she barely even _liked_ him. Not only that but she never would.

Filled with this resolve, Zuko rose and strode through the pouring rain. He would mope over Katara no more. That chapter of his life ended now.

The clouds thickened and single flash of lightning and a rumble of thunder followed him as he headed for the safety of the palace.


End file.
